Wrestling with God

In our discussions yesterday we spent a great deal of time looking at the early Monastic movement.  Have we ever heard of St. Antony?   Antony spent twenty years stored up in the wreckage of an old castle - wrestling with all of his demons.  He only at bread and water - it is rumored that people heading out to see him often heard strange noises as he battled the demons in his life.  Want to see some interesting art - google St. Antony and pictures - the people living in the time of Antony - 300AD and later had serious imaginations.

What does the life of Antony have to say to inform us today?  Please don't fear that I will be heading to Potter County for the next 3 years just to work out my demons - though it may be a good idea I think we all could be helped by spending a weekend or a half an hour a day considering our "demons" - our sins, struggles - lust, anxiousness, people pleasing, impatience, materialism, and so on.  It seems to me that we work awfully hard to never have to face those nasty little guys - most walkers wear headphones with back ground noise or watch the TV at the gym.  If we can fill our lives to the brim every moment - then we never have to look at our faults.  Sorry to say if we never explore them, repent from them, and hand them to God we certainly will never chip away at them.  

It is best actually to work on that stuff within the community of saints - with a counselor, in a small group, with a pastor, or friend.  We are all broken.  Christ is calling us to a life of wrestling and healing - trust in Christ and the community to walk with us.  WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER.  As a wise man once said - We are all a bunch of bozos on the bus - and we need Jesus to drive us home.  

Blessings

Hunter

Wednesday

Yesterday,

We looked at the lives of early monks and desert fathers/mothers - Why did people in the early days of the church leave society and head to the desert to wrestle with God and their own lives?  

Partially the move was facilitated by a culture that was becoming completely Christian yet many felt that the direction of the church was following culture to closely and they yearned for a deeper relationship with God - they also realized that many biblical leaders Jesus and Paul included, went to the desert to prepare for their own ministries.  By heading out to the desert lay people were afforded the opportunity to engage God in ways that they could not in the public setting.  

Today we will be thinking more deeply about what we can learn from these groups of recluses.  

Beyond that things are quiet here - no Tv, no radio - just me, my classmates, God, and nature.  

Blessings

I have access

Access to the internet is available in one room of the retreat center.  Therefore I will be blogging still - aren't you lucky.

Two things going through my head - my distinguished and BELOVED professors are now aware of this blog - so I should not tell any of you how hard it was to stay awake yesterday.  OOPs.  Well I have been relatively honest with my faltering interest in history, yet I am beginning to see the way that is shapes our now.  

So yesterday we talked about Gnosticism, Mysticism, and some of the other cultural philosophical stuff that was going on at the time of the early church beginnings.  

today we begin looking at the actual practices of those early church leaders - with gnosticism behind us and a good nights sleep today should be a better day.  Well, maybe gnosticism is never behind us, but it will not be the focus of the discussions.

Peace to you - look for some pictures of the retreat center - NICE PLACE!!!!!

Packing up my computer

tomorrow we head to a retreat center.  Will I have internet access?

If not see you in a week - if so I will continue to update.

hunter

Sunday Morning Worship

Well we went to the African American Pasadena Church which is a church of God church.  This was certainly a new experience.  Again I had some criticisms, but I will say this - many people were moved the music was done well, and the pastors were real - in other words they did not try to be anything that they were not.  

There was something very powerful about singing the song "Trading my sorrows" with a group of African American people.  What are the sorrows that I have to offer to God compared to their experiences?  It was an interesting experience.  I am continually reminded that we do not have to worship in the ways that suit me to meet God.  Jesus comes in many shapes and forms, songs and people.  

Pizza for lunch yum.

Sunday morning reflection and reading

Here is the thing about reading scripture.  As anything if we glance over it without much thought or absorption we are certain to miss the power.  

This morning I set out with my Bible and my music toward my "new" special outdoors place - City Hall.  (I will post a picture)  City hall has the most wonderful courtyard with indigenous trees, roses, a water fountain, and benches.  Wow!  

I sat and opened my Bible to the Psalms not knowing quite where else to go.  Psalm 116 to be exact.  I read the text from verse 1 to verse 7 twice.  then i considered the words that were jumping out at me.  REST, BOUNTIFULLY, AND MERCIFUL.  

I read the passage again.  Then I began to prayerfully reflect on what those words were saying or meaning to me.  When we allow the words to touch our heart we are opening ourselves for change.  i can be as our society develops one who is rarely pleased with my position in life.  There always seems to be something else out there that I need.  A car that gets better gas mileage, Zion with loads of kids, seniors and everything in between all appreciating everyone else' worship preference, the perfect house in the right neighborhood, perfect family without any issues - there is always something to strive toward.  In many respects to rest is to fall behind in my book.  

SO WHAT ARE THOSE WORDS SAYING TO ME AS I LET THEM TOUCH MY HEART?

The lord Jesus has been incredibly bountiful to me and merciful.  I truly have a wonderful and supportive wife who is willing to be a single parent for two weeks so that I can draw nearer to God - she also understands that my growth will be her growth we are a team.  the Lord Jesus has blessed me in calling me to an amazing spirit filled congregation.  One that reaches out to others, one that enjoys being together, a congregation that is quietly drawing nearer to the heart of Jesus and encourages me to lead in that - WoW!  The Lord has bountifully blessed me with Co-pastors in Christ that in a whole weeks time have not called me once - they are confident and capable.  THANK YOU SCOTT, BETH, GLENN, JENN, AND INTERN NATE.  And they love Jesus and want nothing more than to see the Kingdom of God being built at Zion.  I could go on from recognizing a board that cares for me and the congregation, friends that love me for who I am to the fact that I own a car that gets 34 miles per gallon of gas and a very nice house in a sweet neighborhood.  The Lord is bountiful and merciful to me.  

that is where the rest comes in.  In the midst of the bounty - the mercy lies in rest - it is ok to enjoy the bounty we have and be happy.  Certainly we want desperately to draw nearer to God, but sometimes that demands nothing more than resting in the bounty that we have.  

Life is good and it is a spiritual discipline to realize that.  

Hunter

Saturday down

Well it is hot.  I did some reading took a Californian Siesta - went on a long walk in the 105 degree heat - read some more and then ate supper.  It has been a day of solitude - not a bad thing thou I wish it had been more intentional - less Phillies.  

tomorrow I have two choices for church.  An african american church - unfamiliar or Pasadena Mennonite - more familiar.  They are across the street from one another and I may be tempted to try both.  I could use a little familiar right about now.  

I am not sure if I will be able to post messages after tomorrow - monday we move to the Retreat center and they may not have wireless access - though I will try to fill you all in when I get back.  

Thanks for your prayers and cares.

Hunter

First Class is in the books

To finish off the week we spent the morning continuing to consider scripture and teaching methods.  

Try this - Find a set of verses - no more than 10, no less than 4.  Don't get caught up on number of verses We read John 10:1-10.  

Pray for God's illumination.

Read the scripture.

Ask yourself these questions or should I say ask the text:

What does this text say about God?

What does this text say about Humanity?

What is God calling me to be or do in this scripture?

Have fun with that!

Hunter

Not a bad thing to say about those Catholics...

Well we went to PF Changs for dinner together as a group - well there were 4 of us.  We sat down next to grandparents working on culturizing two grandsons.  As i sat down Grandma was overheard saying to a grandson - "Look at those men they were little like you once, and I bet they sat like gentlemen when they went to a restaurant."  Well i could not help myself but to correct her - I was terrible at restaurants - something about my patience.  Well we continued talking - they shared some shrimp with us and in the end picked up the tab for supper.  What a nice thing to do.  They were catholic, but embraced our journey with joy.  It is nice to remember that we are all brothers and sisters in Christ and we all have a great deal to learn from one another.  

Thursday is in the books.  

Today we focused on scripture and reading scripture all day.  It was a wonderful day.  We reflected through a sort of prayer/reading method called Lectio Divina - Divine Reading.  The text was from Psalm 27.  Christ is indeed our stronghold and our safe place.  

Our basic point of education is that the Scriptures - the revelation of God to us is transformational to our lives.  By reading scripture in an intentional prayerful manner we allow the scriptures to sink into our minds, our hearts, our souls.  That revealing word will change us and transform us toward the example that is Christ.  

Tomorrow i have class until 12 - then I am off till monday morning.  Lots of time get done more reading and think more deeply about my writing assignment.  

Off to dinner - for those that have commented - thank you.  it is wonderful to know that you are thinking of and praying with me.  I have not had the time to reply and need to figure out how.  this weekend may afford a little more time.  

blessing in the name of our Lord and savior Jesus Christ

Hunter

Day three Down.  

Heard last night was a bit hard on the kids and Brianna O. who was watching them.  Supposedly Aiden continues to ask "Is Daddy at church?"  

Today we spent the majority of the day discussing cultural analysis and it does not look pretty.  One assignment was to go downtown and observe.  Once observations were made we were invited to consider the ways that our culture adjusts or affects our faith.  Starbucks the coffee shop showed us a society that loves lots of choices, and wants the perfect cup of coffee.  How does our desire for choices and high quality goods influence our hopes for a service on sunday morning.  

People came in one by one and bought coffee - all a part of something that is drinking coffee, but they did not talk to one another, brush shoulders, or even say hello.  Do we want to come to church for our dose of Jesus with the hopes of not having to be bothered by relationships? These are some of the questions we asked.  

Another interesting question was this - "How much should our culture inform or form the way that we share the message of Christ?"  

As is the norm -  there is not time or space to consider all of the questions we wrestled with, but those are a few.   

Our day ended as we began to consider our research paper - Due in November.  We are encouraged to begin thinking about the FINAL paper as we write the smaller ones so that we may be able to use research from the smaller ones to help write the big one - 100-200 pages i think.  Well right now I am leaning toward writing a paper on the ways that Christian Spiritual practice can be used to develop leadership skills and attributes.  So paper - small paper number one is going to focus on using scripture to develop leadership reflection for our church board.  They don't even know of the plan yet.  I will write more about this later.  

For now - Know that Zion and my family are in my thoughts.

Blessings 

Day two in the books.  It seems that some of you have tried to comment and are struggling with that - my apologies, but I have no idea how this thing works.  It is good to know that many of you are checking in and care deeply about me and the journey that we are on.  

What did we do today - We began by looking at Acts 8 the story of Philip and the ethiopian eunuch.  Philip guided by the spirit of Jesus Christ helped the eunuch make sense of the Bible.   We discussed the difference between being a guide and an explainer.  The guide invites involvement from the learner where as the explainer opens the can and fills it with info.  I want to be a guide.  We looked at our understanding of the Holy Spirit and scripture.  the holy Spirit inspired scripture as it was written and illuminates our reading.  

When you open the Bible don't be afraid to say a prayer inviting the Spirit to illuminate the word of God for you.  

In the afternoon we talked a bit about our culture as it is presented in sitcoms, grocery store magazines, and children's cartoons.   This was a little scary.  Certainly you will hear more about this in time.

Tomorrow we have a special assignment - it is a secret - look forward to hearing more.  

missing all of you

blessings

Hunter

Ok Day one is down.  Our focus for the first day was on opening stuff.  To get the juices flowing we discussed the difference between monastic learning and scholastic - one distinction being that scholastic learners believe that we can learn about something without being changed by it.  As Christian learners we believe that when we study God and or the scriptures - God's revelation of self we can not avoid being changed.  I pray that we are changing - growing as we meet on sundays and meditate on scriptures together.  

Our professor then relayed his 12 assumptions that began with the belief that God is always with us.  Always and everywhere, that we are created in God's image and that God wants to be in relationship with us - that in fact we yearn for that relationship.  I was encouraged to believe that we have heard sermons pertaining to all of those assumptions at some time in the last year or so.  Can you hear me patting my back.  

In the afternoon we wrestled with sensing God's presence - what helps us and what gets in the way.  We will continue to wrestle with this presence as we continue to grow in awareness.  God is with us on Sunday mornings, as we fellowship and as we serve together - can we see God?  

There was lots more, but this blog won't contain it all.  It is time to start thinking about my project - I will give you some hints when I start to find some direction.  

OHHH about last nights service - It was OK - I found myself behaving in a critical manner.  And then I reminded myself that though not all of the service was what I appreciate, that many around me were worshipping in a wonderful way.  Jesus was there despite my negativity.  Thanks be to God.

Blessings

In my room!

The flights were long, but uneventful.  I am in Pasadena - took a walk and found a car show.  Norm Keller, Speedy, Wayne, Harold, and others would have been proud I checked out each car.  Tonight I head out to a Post-Modern worship service called THE WAREHOUSE.  Should be interesting.  Classes begin tomorrow - I miss the kids already and Grace too.  I will try to keep my whining too myself. 

Saturday, the kids are sleeping and I am working on last minute duck alignment.  I am seemingly a bit more anxious than I thought - going to miss the family a lot.  Wondering how the church will ever survive without me - thankful for an excellent staff who can handle just about anything.  And I have no idea what I am in for.  Got to go.  The next post should be in California.

First Post

This is my first post.  I hope that this blog will enable friends, immediate family, and Zion family to keep on top of my experiences as I plow into DMin studies.  

So here is some stuff to get us on the same page.  Why Fuller?  Fuller is a seminary that offers a high quality well respected program in the course that I sensed God calling me too - Spirituality.  

Why Spirituality?  - Can we do anything more important in this Christian faith journey than be in touch with our creator?  We were built for relationship with God and Jesus - by pursuing spirituality we enter directly into that relationship development.  Listening, reflecting, and looking for God in our lives.  A secondary thought is that the current generation of young people are deeply concerned with spiritual things and we want to be on the cutting edge, not behind it.

What is the DMin?  It is a program designed to run along with full-time ministry.  We read a lot.  Go to class two weeks a year.  Engage the congregation with what we are learning.  Then write about it.  Sounds like a growth opportunity for both Hunter and Zion.  A win win.  

Russ Mast picks me up on Sunday the 15th - Father's day - at 4:15am.  The flight leaves at 7.  Arrive in Burbank at 11 or so and check into the guest house of Fuller.  Then what?  Well I have a 6 oclock service to check out at a local church - then to bed.  

Please pray that I won't get too homesick - will miss the family - and that Christ transforms me in this journey.  

Blessings

Hunter